One Hard Day

Today was one of those. One hard day! Not to be confused with One Fine Day, which is an amazing romantic comedy about, you guessed it, a working mom.

I was dizzy from my roller coaster of emotions by 8:30am. Until I started crying I was actually quite proud of myself. I had been to the gym. I had showered before the children woke up! We had managed to take our guests on their morning walk.

And....drum roll please...

We made it to morning prayer on time! Today's devotional (how we start our homeschool day) was about praising God through music. We love our music in this house. Not usually very religious, unless you're counting Florida Georgia Line, but there's always some beat going. So anyway, I thought it appropriate to share my favorite hymn with the kids: Here I am, Lord. We hadn't made it past the first verse when the tears started rolling. Why?! Why these tears?! I thought I was having a great day?!

Well, that's just it. #workingmom I was having a good day and so...I was exhausted. That's the price of wanting to have your cake and eat it too. Of trying to be a well rounded human being. Of trying to treat each of your responsibilities (or maybe your needs) as you think they deserve. Exhaustion. Emotional even more than physical, in my humble experience. How could I not be exhausted? The standards (my self-imposed standards) are high! The responsibilities, many.

If you're not careful, and I'm often not, you miss the beauty in the rush to finish all the things. The beauty! That hymn brought on those tears; annoying and untimely, in many ways. But those tears had that littlest baby of mine scooting right into my lap, putting her whole tiny palm against my cheek and just smiling and giggling until I was doing it too. When I was calm again I asked her to take a picture with me and she agreed. But it's hard to get a moment alone with momma.